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Conversations with Stephie Red

Today we’d like to introduce you to Stephie Red.

Hi Stephie, it’s an honor to have you on the platform. Thanks for taking the time to share your story with us – to start maybe you can share some of your backstory with our readers?
Many of us have been or are currently in stressful situations. This can pertain to the workspace, our everyday environments that shape our daily lives and a most notable subject we can all relate to… relationships. And boy do I have a lot to say about that one.

For some inexplicable reason like a magnet, the men that I seem to attract into my life range from narcissists, con men, and/or pathological liars. When crossing paths with men like these, I can assure you that one doesn’t come out of a relationship without having acquired some interesting stories to tell. I could even write a book based on my experiences. One chapter dedicated to each man that has ever screwed me over. However, one man in particular, was a true gem! Brian Michael McDevitt, (A very charming, charismatic, articulate, and convincing gentleman). Turns out that Brian was involved in one of history’s most mystifying art thefts of all time. An enigma that has left detectives and other investigators perplexed to this day. Over thirty years later and an estimated five hundred million dollars’ worth of stolen art later, the thirteen art pieces from the Boston Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum, have not been found.

…And so, it continued… many years down the road, I still found myself entering into less-than-ideal relationships. Except only now, I found myself trapped in an unhealthy marriage that started to have a negative impact on me. As time passed, I felt myself suffocating. Trapped by a legal piece of paper that chained me to my own tormentor. It took a toll on my spirit, my self-esteem, and eventually my health. When is enough, enough? That is when it dawned on me to start drawing for this specific situation. For me, this was and still is a great way for me to express myself. I found it was a great outlet, a form of therapy to help me cope with a time in my life where I was stuck married to a narcissistic sociopath!

Years later, after breaking free from a miserable marriage and establishing a life of my own, I started an Instagram and Facebook page. These pages were created to help me get through rough times and share my experiences with others. It led me to open up a Private “Narcissist Escape Room” on Facebook. (The link to this page is towards the end of this article) This is a place to get support. To vent, laugh, cry or just listen to other stories and see that you are not alone which for many is a tremendous help.

This page has helped many individuals gain some strength to continue in the situation they are in, or at least get strong enough with everyone’s support, to be able to have the possible opportunity to leave the bad situation they are in. In such a short time, the room has grown to over 8.2K members and continues to grow today.

I’m sure you wouldn’t say it’s been obstacle free, but so far would you say the journey have been a fairly smooth road?
It has absolutely not been a smooth road! Every unhealthy relationship I was in, took a toll on me! As did my ex husband (for 18 years). Not only was I dealing with daily gaslighting but I was constantly trying my best to protect my 3 innocent beautiful children. And, of course my animals!!!

I was waking up to being aware of how depressed and broken I was in this marriage. Towards the tail-end of it, I was diagnosed with a neurological disease, Chronic Inflammation Demyelinating Polyneuropathy (CIDP). This disease attacked the nerves in my body and I was unable to walk, stand, eat, hold anything heavier than 1 pound, and couldn’t stop shaking. My hands and feet were so cold it changed my everyday life in ways that are incomprehensible!!!!! I constantly felt like I was standing in a bucket of ice – up to my calves.

4 months of deteriorating, and visiting every kind of Dr. out there, (which BTW, not one of them knew what was wrong with me), I finally was fortunate to find a Neurologist who diagnosed me and got me on Immunoglobulin therapy (IVIG) treatment immediately. During this specific time my ex treated me so cruelly and insensitively. It was like I became a hindrance to him. This was the time I knew things had to change.

During my 6 months of treatments, I also found a wonderful therapist who I saw weekly for 3 years. She felt I was in a very unhealthy situation and worked with me to help me understand what I was living with, and how to better myself and my situation. I cannot tell you besides feeling so sick and being now handicapped, how afraid I was to leave with three children and stay safe.

Long story short, I am stronger than I know. With no money, I planned my escape and followed through. The Divorce was scary and hard but a dream compared to staying with my ex. I know not all people can do this because of their lack of safety but let’s just say I was one of the lucky ones. It’s been a very difficult but rewarding 7 years.

Today, my children, animals and I are safe. I live in my dream destination and I know I will never be the subject of anyones abuse again! It is my passion to give back and let other’s know there is HOPE! Don’t let anyone treat you like sh*t and no one “owns” you!

Appreciate you sharing that. What else should we know about what you do?
Growing up in a 3rd world country, there was no television to watch. I spent most of my time drawing, creating, playing with my pets, and traveling with my family. I became accustomed to self-entertainment and never relied on others to keep me busy.

That has been a big plus for me. To this day, I am still occupied with keeping myself busy with creating and growing mentally. I have and continue to use drawing as a sort of therapy to express myself. This is what started the character that I have created and share on social media.

You can find my pages “Marc the Narc” on Instagram and Facebook, as well as my “Narcissist Escape Room” on Facebook. These links are all available towards the end of this article.

What are your plans for the future?
I am currently building a new website for everyone to enjoy. I have so many fun projects that I am working on that I plan to add. I will be focusing on inspirational items and adding them to the site ‘NarcissistEscapeRoom.com’ for narcissist survivors, and those currently feeling lost. My desired result is to motivate everyone who is feeling lost and hopeless. I would like to encourage a person, or someone you know, who may need this – to keep strong and move forward in their journey.

It is also important for me to help remind a survivor, and those feeling trapped, that they are not alone in this journey.

Contact Info:


Image Credits

All images are created in the Narcissist Escape Room by Stephie.

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