Today we’d like to introduce you to Stephanie Alexander.
Stephanie, please share your story with us. How did you get to where you are today?
Doing something like this has always been a dream of mine. I got accepted to the Fashion Institute of Design & Merchandising out of high school, although I never had the opportunity to go because when I finally figured out what direction I wanted to go, I found out I was pregnant with my now ten year old daughter. She’s been my motivation, my fire, and at times my savior for her whole life.
As a single mom, I had to do what I needed to, to keep food on the table and a roof over our heads, which meant putting the dream on hold until the time was right. Over the years, I had jobs in mortgage (more than once), accounting, serving, running rental car desks, and now in the secondary market for mortgage loans. With those as well as the incredible support system I had in my family I was able to do well for the both of us… but I never forgot about my passion. Something creative was always in the back of my mind. Any time someone was throwing a party, or as I got older and my friends started getting married, I would jump at any opportunity I had to help with design, research, setup, etc. No task was too much. It felt good to dust off my skills and learn new things when I could! A few months before my daughter’s 6th birthday, I met the man who I now have the honor of calling my husband. He’s been so supportive of anything I wanted to take on, and after about three years of being together, I decided it was time to go back to school.
Instead of re-applying to the Fashion Institute, I decided to use all the skills I had acquired in my nearly ten years of corporate work and apply it to the creativity I’d always kept on the back burner. With that in mind, I applied to the University of San Diego and in just under a year, received my certificate in their Event Management program. This program (and it’s exquisite instructors) gave me the knowledge and confidence I needed to start my own business as an event planner. I felt complete again. In October of 2018, Ivy Lane Events was opened, and I’ve been slowly growing into where I’m at today (and there’s still so much more growth ahead). I now offer three different types of packages, a la carte menus, just design work (as that’s the biggest part of my origin story), and although I specialize in weddings, I love doing all sorts of events! I’ve recently had the pleasure of adding baby showers, graduation parties, and birthday parties to my repertoire.
Overall, has it been relatively smooth? If not, what were some of the struggles along the way?
No, it’s definitely not been easy. It’s been a VERY slow process, but I think that anything you love takes time. Especially in the business I’m in. I’ve had a full-time day job (still do), and I’ve had to make time for everything (family, school, clients, events, and all my administrative business work) all while maintaining a high-stress and time-consuming day job. I’ve had my fair share of breakdowns, stress-induced illness, failures, and financial strain while trying to make my own dreams come true. It’s said that if you love what you do, you won’t work a day in your life. I don’t necessarily agree with that entire sentiment, however I do believe that if you love what you do, all the hardship will be worth it when you get where you’re going. I have truly loved my journey, and every project I have been a part of has a little piece of my heart in it. I put my soul into everything I do, and every client I have. It’s wonderful and exhausting, but I’ve never had a moment of regret.
Any advice I have is both from my own first-hand experience, as well as the guidance I’ve received from a beloved friend and mentor. To start, I’d say take everything one step at a time. I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again, anything worth doing is going to be a slow process. It’s going to be hard, it’s going to hurt sometimes, but don’t quit. That may be the only thing you’d ever regret doing. It’s ok to write a list and just do one thing each day if that’s all you have the energy for! It’s also surprisingly easy to accomplish a lot of little tasks you didn’t think you had the time for during the “in between” moments. If you want to be lazy in bed on a Saturday morning, do it! But while you’re doing that, write down your ‘to do’ list for the day or the week. Send a quick email during your uber ride, or during your lunch break. Make phone calls while you’re driving. It’s incredible how much you can get done without even thinking about it.
For the big stuff, schedule your time wisely. If you use a planner, physically write down what you’re doing and between what hours you want to do it. Make the time to concentrate, and then when that time is up, get up and truly be done. Working into the wee hours of the night will really hurt you more than benefit you. One huge piece of advice I can’t stress enough is to keep organized. If your space is a mess, your mind is a mess. Organization is key! Lastly, be kind to yourself. You ARE doing a great job. You ARE doing enough. Nothing is going to be perfect, so be sure to take the time to soak in the little successes as well as the big ones. Rome wasn’t built in a day, and neither is your passion project.
What should we know about Ivy Lane Events? What do you do best? What sets you apart from the competition?
Most people would call me an event planner, but I’ve tried to create something a little bit more than that. In my email signature, I call myself “Chaos Coordinator”, because that really frankly encompasses what I do. From the time a client brings me on, I take on a plethora of hats. I like to get to really know my clients during our time together. Often times we end up as friends because I am let into such an intimate time and area of their life no matter what type of event I may have been brought onto. I first wear the hat of a designer as I organize the pieces of their vision and create a mood board. I switch gears to a makeshift accountant if you will and help them build a budget based on their needs and what is most important to them. I then wrangle the vendors best suited to my client’s needs, making sure to read each contract to its fullest and lend suggestions and advice based on every different situation. Every single client will require me to be a juggler and a chameleon, but it’s all in their best interest. Then day-of I wear all the hats almost simultaneously. I’m point A of communication, a problem solver, a set designer, and most importantly a source of peace for them. Throughout the entire process, I’m there for them in more than just a business sense. Due to the personal nature of my job, I’m also a hand holder, a shoulder to lean on, a stress reliever, a therapist, a source of strength and knowledgeable advice.
I think what I love most about the people I get to work with is the unique and personal quality each of them brings to the table. My company motto is “Be Your Own Bold” and I really try to encourage all of my clients to do so. I’ve been around this industry many years (8 times a bridesmaid!), and honestly I never get tired of it. The beautiful traditions with modern twists, & delicate intricacies, that all end in a ragin’ after party is something I think a part of me will always love. That being said, one thing I’ve always disliked about it is that brides (couples) are so pigeonholed into an industry “standard” now that everything is the same. If you’ve been to one wedding in the last ten years, you’ve been to them all, and it’s making it harder and harder for my clients to justify the investment they put into these events. It’s because of this issue that I thought my different view would be a benefit for people looking for a change. Something a little more unique to them as individuals and as a couple. I always want guests to arrive and notice how deeply personal each event is to the people who are hosting it. People need an option… a friend they can go to who won’t just drag them into something basic and stereotypical. I don’t have any delusions that I will change the world, but I do want to change some minds… even if it’s only a few… that you can have something different that is truly worth investing their time, money, and emotions into. That’s my goal. To give two people who love each other something worth investing in that’s solely “them”.
Looking back on your childhood, what experiences do you feel played an important role in shaping the person you grew up to be?
My parents allowed me to be as independent as I wanted to be from a pretty young age. They made sure I knew how to take care of myself, how to teach myself things or look things up, engage my critical thinking skills instead of quitting at the first sign of trouble. I’d say that sort of independent upbringing led to most of my successes in life. I’m not afraid of a challenge, I know how to problem solve (even if it takes some creativity), and I’m confident in myself and my skills both in what I do in my career, and just as an adult. I’m always so grateful that I’ve had such an incredible support system in my parents. They’ve pushed me to do anything I set my mind to and been right behind me cheering the whole way. In a way, they’ve really given me everything I have by either teaching me to get it on my own or by supporting me when I needed some guidance. They’re truly incredible people.
Pricing:
- Bronze Package – $1200
- Silver Package – $2200
- Gold Package – Starting at $3000
Contact Info:
- Website: ivylaneeventssd.com
- Phone: 760-500-3195
- Email: ivylaneevents.sd@gmail.com
- Instagram: @ivylaneevents.sd
- Facebook: facebook.com/ivylaneeventssd
Image Credit:
Alyss Charles, Kari Martinez
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