Today we’d like to introduce you to Cesar Vallin.
Hi Cesar, thanks for joining us today. We’d love for you to start by introducing yourself.
I’m Cesar Vallin, a 43-year-old San Diego native. I’m blessed to have married my soulmate, Denise, and have become a proud stepfather to Mila & Thalia. We have a cat named Kona and a Dog named Ocho.
With over 25 years in the hospitality scene, I currently serve as the managing partner of Cloak and Petal in Little Italy. Additionally, we are actively looking to expand our brand and new concepts. Outside of the food industry, I own and operate AIRBNB rental properties with my beautiful sister, host a podcast named “Ironminds” with 20+ episodes and am launching a new series, “The Ready for All Show,” spotlighting entrepreneurship, holistic health, and spirituality—available across all major streaming platforms.
My proudest endeavors are becoming a husband to my beautiful wife and step father to her beautiful daughters Mila and Thalia. I am honored everyday to be trusted and help guide our family to live healthier and serve our society as good humans! In business Cloak and Petal, opened its doors in December 2017. Over the past six years, it’s earned its reputation as one of the most distinctive dining spots, thanks to our two centerpiece cherry blossom trees, ’90s hip-hop ambiance, artistic flair, and unparalleled sushi creations. This unique blend has cultivated a devoted clientele.
I’m sure it wasn’t obstacle-free, but would you say the journey has been fairly smooth so far?
One of the most significant triumphs has been my journey towards sobriety and the newfound clarity it has brought into my life. The initial reason I embarked on this path was to prove to a friend that I could maintain complete sobriety. During a conversation with my dear friend Geena, a popular local radio host, I casually mentioned that I stayed sober for 30 days every January. To my surprise, she challenged the authenticity of my sobriety, asserting that using other drugs invalidated my claim. Her question stung: when was the last time I was truly 100% sober? I found myself speechless, needing a week to confront the truth. It dawned on me that for the past 16 years, I had been numbing myself with a
dangerous cocktail of alcohol, pain pills (sometimes up to 20 day), marijuana, cocaine, and ecstasy.
In my distorted perspective, I believed I wasn’t addicted because I dabbled in a bit of everything. However, when I took a step back and saw the bigger picture, I realized that I had spent the better part of those 16 years intoxicated or
high, with only sporadic breaks. This newfound clarity prompted me to take ownership of my wrecked relationship with myself and substances, marking the beginning of my journey into self-discovery.
I made a pact with myself to remain sober for 60 days, but during a conversation with a friend, I felt so good that I mentioned I could probably go for six months. A friend’s playful challenge fueled my determination to reach one year of sobriety. I questioned my ability to endure the full year, but I remained committed, embracing the overwhelming clarity that washed over my life. During this period,
I not only gained mental clarity but also recognized that my
relationships, both with myself and women, had been built upon a foundation of alcohol, drugs, and childhood sexual trauma.
I had been punishing myself throughout my life, leaving those closest to me to pick up the pieces.
I had become a master manipulator, narcissist, and a victim of my own circumstances. I had convinced everyone, including myself, that I was blameless. Then, I stumbled upon the book “Extreme Ownership” by Jocko Willink. Sitting on a beach in La Jolla, tears streaming down my face, I realized that I couldn’t continue living this lie, seeking acceptance from others and material possessions. Behind the facade of Happy Cesar, who bought drinks for everyone and pretended everything was fine, lived a destructive life of alcohol and drugs, hidden from the world’s view. Nights spent alternating from putting a bottle of scotch and glock 17 around my lips, lonely conversations with myself, and desperate cries, followed by more pills or substances up my nose. Xanax to help me sleep, ensuring
I appeared well-rested
to those who had no idea. Mornings began with a loaded gun and scattered bullets on the floor, blurry memories of the night before, and a convincing denial that it ever happened. A master manipulator and expert bullshitter can make anyone believe they’re okay.
This is the clarity that sobriety gifted me with. It wasn’t until six months into my journey that I fully grasped the extent of my destructive relationship with alcohol and drugs when I was alone..
When faced with the decision of whether to drink a glass of Don Julio 1942 on New Year’s Eve, after 364 days of sobriety, something remarkable happened. Tears welled up in my eyes as I stared at that glass, and my manager whispered, “It’s not about how you’ll feel right now; it’s about how you’ll feel tomorrow morning.” The clarity that had eluded me for 16 years suddenly crystallized. It was as if 16 years of pain, drugs, and alcohol flashed before my eyes, and I made the choice not to drink. In that one year, I gained more clarity than in my previous 16 years.
My last drink of alcohol was on Dec 31st 2016. I lost my 10-year-old business in February of 2017, borrowed money to file for bankruptcy in May of 2017 and, miraculously, within eight months, got back on my feet to open one of the most anticipated restaurants of the year by Dec 22nd of 2017. Since then we have been in the conversation as one of the most popular restaurants to try in San Diego. It has now been eight years since my last drink of alcohol.
I found solace in ceremonial ayahuasca and psilocybin rituals, dedicating myself to becoming the best version of myself.
We’ve been impressed with Cloak and Petal, but for folks who might not be as familiar, what can you share with them about what you do and what sets you apart from others?
Cloak and Petal, opened its doors in December 2017. Over the past six years, it’s earned its reputation as one of the most distinctive dining spots, thanks to our two centerpiece cherry blossom trees, ’90s hip-hop ambiance, artistic flair, and unparalleled sushi creations. This unique blend has cultivated a devoted clientele. Which has helped us receive the honors to be featured in the Michelin Guide in the past 5 straight years.
We’ve recently expanded with a fresh addition: Shibuya Nights, a second bar within the establishment. Inspired by the vibrant streets of Shibuya and Harajuku in Tokyo, this space is both a waiting area and a portal to a Tokyo nighttime experience. Guests can order from the Cloak and Petal menu, but the real draw is our exclusive range of Japanese whiskies and a secret menu reserved solely for Shibuya Nights Bar. Our vision is to et diners experience Tokyo’s daylight upon entering Cloak and Petal and its nightlife as they step into the Shibuya Nights section. We host happy hours at the front bar and dining room from Monday to Friday excluding major holidays, while Shibuya Nights features all-night specials on Thursdays, starting 6:30 pm until closing.
Any advice for finding a mentor or networking in general?
Over the last 20+ years, I wouldn’t have been able to overcome the challenges and reach the success I have without my mentors and network. No one does it alone. As a kid, my dad used to force me to ask people for advice and guidance.
I fucking hated it. I was shy and terrified of rejection, scared someone wouldn’t be willing to help. But looking back, that was the start of developing one of my strongest skill sets.
Over time, I’ve gotten better at it.
I found the courage and the words to ask for support and guidance. Now,
I make sure I have at least one mentor in every area of my life—business (often more than one), health and fitness, nutrition, and spiritually, I’ve got a handful.
Another key to my success is my network. I’m just a phone call or text away from so many great teachers and resources. You can’t put a price tag on a conversation with someone who can share their success story and guidance.
You’d be surprised who’s willing to help. My only advice: show up prepared, be ready to listen, and don’t waste their fucking time.
Contact Info:
- Website: cloakandpetal.com
- Instagram: cloakandpetal
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/CloakAndPetal/
- Yelp: https://www.yelp.com/biz/cloak-and-petal-san-diego?osq=Cloak+and+Pedal
- Other: https://www.instagram.com/cesar_readyforall?utm_source=ig_web_button_share_sheet&igsh=ZDNlZDc0MzIxNw==
Image Credits
Will Coronel (wedding pic)
