Today we’d like to introduce you to Elijah Brady.
Alright, so thank you so much for sharing your story and insight with our readers. To kick things off, can you tell us a bit about how you got started?
My mom had me at 16 raising me as a single parent, I would definitely say it was hard for her. I was a stepparent at 25& it was hard. So, 16 with a newborn, I couldn’t imagine. She didn’t have the best support system from her father, let alone my biological father not helping her. She did the best she could, especially with only knowing what she was taught. She could have been selfish & thought about herself. Her future & not have had to struggle, but she chose to keep me & raise me. Maybe it wasn’t the best parenting, but I will always be very thankful for my mom, my dad (which is my stepdad but raised me since I was 10) & my sisters. They’re all very supportive & always there for me when I fall short. So, I’m very blessed having them in my life.
I knew since I was little I wanted to make a difference, just didn’t know how or what I would be doing. I had high anxiety; I was a quiet kid at school. Friends with everyone, but very quiet & to myself unless I was playing sports.
Helped my anxiety a lot to be honest. Growing up, my mom would always tell me stop biting your nails, stop shaking or tapping on things.
As I got older, I started noticing my anxiety getting worse, even having high social anxiety with people that I knew or even grew up with. I started drinking a little too much; when drinking I would get out of my awkward bubble. I was able to talk more & feel comfortable. I started noticing I wasn’t happy & that it would only last for a few hours. It wasn’t that I wasn’t comfortable with people; I wasn’t comfortable within myself. I came out as a transgender male in 2020 to my family. I started testosterone in 2021 & since then have finally been comfortable with my appearance. When I first started testosterone, you have to see a psychiatrist. To make sure you’re stable enough to be on the medication, they ask you so much in just one hour. From your childhood to in between your teen years to now as an adult. They decide whether you’re stable enough to start the medication.
I’m bad about talking about my feelings; it’s like an overthinking & overwhelming feeling for me. Cause growing up that’s something you don’t really talk about. You just do as you’re told, don’t talk back & don’t complain.
So, he told me good news seems like you’ve wanted this since you were little, so I have no problem approving your testosterone. But I would like to continue to see you at least once a month for your anxiety. So, I agreed.
I was embarrassed to be honest. Because in a Hispanic family you don’t talk about feelings or even anxiety. They pretty much say it’s just in your head; you have nothing. Or that the doctor is just wanting money. As a female, I didn’t talk about my feelings, now as being a transgender male. To even try to talk to someone about my feelings or what makes me anxious was hard. I was embarrassed & felt weak as a male.
I started opening up to my psychiatrist & my therapist.
I noticed my anxiety was getting worse, to the point that I wasn’t sleeping well at all or eating. I would be very irritable or even have panic attacks at work & would sit in my car trying to calm myself down. I really dislike medication because it made me feel as if I was mentally not strong enough to fix my own issues or problems. After a while of being on & off of it by choice.
My psychiatrist & therapist agreed I should try it for at least one year without stopping or missing a dose.
I hate medicine, but I will try anything to help. I told them I want to find stuff that are natural to help with my anxiety. Because I don’t want to rely on pills to help me. They agreed.
At the beginning of January, I had an appointment with my psychiatrist. He said, “Elijah, what are your goals or what do you want for yourself in 2023.“
I told him to be selfish & to actually think about myself. & To not need medication to help with my anxiety by the end of the year. Because I was embarrassed of it.
That same night, I was scrolling through TikTok & saw a video on my for you page of a shirt with a quote that said, “It’s okay, not to be okay.”
In my head, I was like I needed to see that; those 6 words hit me hard. Because it’s okay to not be okay. We are our biggest critics, which is sad. The world already is hard enough living in, so why should we be hard on ourselves for not being okay. I shouldn’t be embarrassed because I have to take medication to help me.
That video changed my mindset of how I looked at my mental health. How I always held in my feelings or thoughts rather than expressing myself. I want people to know it’s okay, not to be okay. It’s okay to talk about your mental health. Because if you don’t, those feelings just build up & eventually you will explode. Just like that shirt changed my mindset, I wanted to help people too. My first shirt I made was the “Don’t waste time overthinking” with a brain & heart in an hourglass. As someone with high anxiety, I wasted so much time in my life overthinking. Time that I honestly can’t get back. & I don’t want that for anyone else. Whether it be my generation, the younger generation, or even the older generation, we all have something in common. None of us are perfect; whoever says otherwise is full of themselves. We’re not always okay & that’s okay. I think all mental health should be normalized rather than being criticized or judged by something you truly can’t control. You can only work around it. So, our company is working hard to come up with clothing that everyone can actually relate to in some way or even say hey maybe this isn’t me, but I know someone who feels like this or going through this & I support them. I don’t want anxiety to define who I am as a person, but that one day, I will win & overcome it. Hints the name of the company “Killing My Anxiety.“
Can you talk to us a bit about the challenges and lessons you’ve learned along the way? Looking back, would you say it’s been easy or smooth in retrospect?
Someone who suffers from high anxiety, it was very difficult not only in my personal life but at work & also in my daily life. Overthinking is like constantly being in a fight or flight mode. It’s hard because you’re so worried, busy thinking about the what-ifs. That you forget what your purpose is or to even live life. Because tomorrow is never promised & we waste it so much time worrying about the little things that we forget to enjoy the present. Accepting you can’t change the past & you can’t worry about the future, just enjoy the today.
Great, so let’s talk business. Can you tell our readers more about what you do and what you think sets you apart from others?
Our focus it to normalize mental health for everyone. So, nobody is ashamed of having anxiety, OCD, bipolar, depression suicidal, ADHD & etc. We worry so much about other stuff going on in the world; why should mental health be one to be hidden. I’m using platforms like Instagram & TikTok to show people it’s okay to be different & not perfect. I believe we’re different from other companies because we’re determined to open doors for people who are struggling to express how they feel or what they’re going through. I was at the gym the other day & wore my shirt “Don’t waste time overthinking “There’s way buffer guys than me at my gym. I was doing shoulders; this buff tall young guy comes up to me … he taps me on the shoulder & says, “Hey bro, thank you. I usually keep to myself, especially emotionally, but I needed to read that…” I told him, “You’ll win; just keep your head up.” It shows no matter the size, age, race, or sexuality, we’re all going through something. We’re all just afraid to speak about it. Honestly, I’m excited; we have so many shirts coming soon & so many ideas. Sometimes I’ll be driving & will pull over just because I came up with a sketch or quote & don’t want to forget it. I haven’t finished it just yet, but the shirt “to kind” will probably be my favorite.
Let’s talk about our city – what do you love? What do you not love?
I love the beaches, especially during summer. My dad will take his jet skis out to the water & we’ll spend the day out there with family & friends, just having a BBQ & riding all day.
My least favorite thing would be the traffic.
After working all day, that’s the worse part being stuck in it.
Contact Info:
- Instagram: https://instagram.com/killingmyanxiety23?igshid=YjNmNGQ3MDY=
- Other: www.tiktok.com/@killingmyanxiety23
Image Credits
Valerie Hawthorne
