Today we’d like to introduce you to Jamie Greek.
Jamie, let’s start with your story. We’d love to hear how you got started and how the journey has been so far.
I actually created my personal blog, The Ivy Chase, back in January of 2014! The catalyst for my blog began with a tragedy (I had recently suffered a late miscarriage) and transformed into a healing-like “Live Journal” (retired Emo-kids… remember that website?!). Being in my mid-twenties, none of my friends were mothers yet or had experienced that kind of loss. At the time, I worked as a Residential Manager for a Group Home for Teen Mothers at Rady Children’s hospital; my job was teaching pregnant girls (who were still kids themselves), how to take care of their children. I felt like my world was suddenly turned upside down; my dreams of becoming a Mom were ripped from me, while I had babies in my face day after day.
Because we lost our daughter, who we named Ivy Chase, 12 weeks into our pregnancy, we had already heard her heartbeat and in turn announced our pregnancy. We then followed up with a “miscarriage announcement” about a week later. While we initially received several awkward responses (and some friends and family did not even acknowledge our loss), something beautiful occurred. Before I knew it, I started to receive several messages over social media from old co-workers, acquaintances from high school, and friends from college, who had also experienced pregnancy loss. It felt like I joined a secret society because I quickly learned that miscarriage was taboo to speak about openly. As my heart denied, became angry, bargained, became depressed, and eventually accepted the loss, writing became my coping skill through it all. I have always been an open book and loved to write, and I knew that if other women who experienced miscarriage were reaching out to me privately, it gave me hope that sharing my story could maybe help at least one other woman out there who lost her child and felt alone like those secret society women did for me.
I wrote consistently on my first blog for almost a year, but life got busy! My husband and I conceived again and had our “rainbow baby” Luella Chase on October 30th, 2016. During her pregnancy, I fell into a pretty anxious, yet numb state. Would I miscarry again? Should I not get too attached? I had a hard time bonding with Luella while she grew inside of me, as a way to protect my fragile heart from more loss, which I can now see affected my postpartum state. I acquired several medical complications during her pregnancy as well but tried to remain as grateful as I could (without getting too close and get my hopes up of course). After giving birth to Lu, I continued to experience physical ailments, including high blood pressure, and again, my world came crashing down. I sought treatment for severe postpartum anxiety three months postpartum and found myself back to grieving an experience I longed for, that did not turn out like in the movies or how other mothers I knew that had such lovely birthing experiences with their children.
While my blog was on the back burner for quite some time, I kept up with posting vulnerable insights into my life as a new Mom throughout that time period on social media. It took lots of therapy, writing, and prayer to get me through that postpartum period, as it was very dark at times. Just like my miscarriage with Ivy Chase, I knew there had to be another secret society for women who experienced this nightmare postpartum, and I was right! Again, I was flooded with messages and phone calls from friends, old and new, who experienced postpartum mental health challenges… who had dealt with them silently.
As I’ve continued to work in the Mental Health field professionally (I am now a School Psychologist at a high school in North County SD), I knew that I needed an outlet for the grief and loneliness I felt on my journey of becoming a Mom. I am responsible for counseling and teaching adolescents about their mental health and coping abilities, and urge them to seek support and use their preferred skills for those moments of hardship. In January 2019, I re-launched my blog, TheIvyChase.com, as a safe a relatable space for women, mothers, and those with mental health needs to feel like a part of a bigger community, rather than a secret society.
Great, so let’s dig a little deeper into the story – has it been an easy path overall and if not, what were the challenges you’ve had to overcome?
Yes and no! With my first blog in 2014, I documented my grief cycle following the miscarriage, but also a lot of kitschy life junk, like recipes, what I did that day, my favorite new songs… you know, things “bloggers” did. I never wanted to be a fashion blogger, but “Lifestyle” bloggers weren’t really around yet. Plus, I was never someone who spoke only about surface-level things, but I felt like I needed to balance the heaviness of posts from my inner dialogue with light-hearted (but boring) nonsense. Overall, I felt like I wasn’t being one hundred percent “me” during that time because I was fearful of being judged- for either being too depressing or too fake.
Along with that, I am a talker and have never been afraid to ask others those hard questions (which is something that comes easily to me having worked in the mental health field for so long). I sometimes get anxious and second guess myself, as I know others may not like my writing style. I am not “fluffy” and cutesy and do not care to butter people up. I tell it like it is. Real. Raw. Vulnerable. Those were my vows when I launched in early 2019. I did not want to be someone I was not and wanted to keep my focus on motherhood and “True Life” happenings, rather than toggle to “Lifestyle” content.
I have learned that I’m sure there are people who make fun of me for blogging behind my back, others who think I’m nuts and that even close friends and family won’t say a thing about it (they must also think I’m nuts). But the trade-off has been the dozens of women who reach out to me and connections that have been made. I went into my launch in 2019 with my goal the same as 2014- if I can help at least one woman to not feel alone, then this was all worth it.
We’d love to hear more about your work.
I write openly about my experiences with motherhood and mental health. My blog is different than the multitude of “Lifestyle” blogs because I am not trying to promote a #sponsored post or represent myself as someone who lives their life in perfectly staged family photos and writes about sourdough starter tips. While those are all great and needed (and a guilty pleasure of mine, too), I do not want anyone to look at my pictures or read my occasionally super positive and sappy posts, to envy my life. My life is far from perfect, and I like it that way. A section of my blog is entitled “True Life” like the old MTV show (that I wish was still around), so readers are fully aware that I am a hot mess, but I can hide it really well. I hope this shows them that all of their favorite bloggers are probably not as perfect as they appear, either.
I hope someone reads my journey and feels connected, safe, and like we are old friends. My goal is for my readers to know that they are not alone in whatever trial they are facing and that they have the power within their own vulnerability to help others, too.
What moment in your career do you look back most fondly on?
My proudest moment in my blog “career” so far is when one of my posts started trending in the tens of thousands over Pinterest! I began to upload and link my posts to Pinterest, and this one took off! It was my “30-Day Self-Care Challenge” post, and I hope it inspired others to join in. I still try to set self-care goals and treats for myself to look forward to daily, if not weekly. I don’t consider my blog a “career” because I work full-time as a School Psychologist, and am a full-time Mom! My blog is like a really loyal, aged pet cat. Always there when you feel like acknowledging her, but gives you space, too. I do not make an income off of my blog, which has never been my goal. Writing is my coping skill, and sharing it with others just makes it that much more rewarding.
Contact Info:
- Website: www.TheIvyChase.com
- Email: theivychase@gmail.com
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theivychase/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theivychase/
- Other: https://www.pinterest.com/theivychase/
Image Credit:
Ryan Greek
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