Today we’d like to introduce you to Joseph Winlove.
Thanks for sharing your story with us, Joseph. So, let’s start at the beginning, and we can move on from there.
For the longest time, I’ve been into music. When we were young, my parents had my brothers, and I sing prayers before meals that forced us to learn how to sing in key. If we were out of tune with the song, they’d sing closer and louder to us until we matched the pitch. At a young age, my parents heard me sounding out “Ode to Joy” on the piano my grandparents let us have, officially starting off my adventure into music. They put me into piano lessons from 1st grade up to middle school where I ditched the ebony and ivory keys for some woodwind action as I took up the flute in band and tenor sax in jazz band. In high school, I went more of a stringed instrument route as my friends got me interested in learning guitar. In my senior year, I picked up the cello and fell in love with it that whole year. Throughout high school, I found I had a penchant for words and looked to poetry to help alleviate my brooding angst, writing poems that used words like “fascist” in a completely wrong context. I just wanted to use it because I heard it in a Weezer song.
During that whole formative voyage, I’d always felt very self-conscious about the art I was learning. I felt like I was pretty good at what I did, but was never the best. I would always see my peers doing so much better at those things that it made me feel like those realms weren’t worth pursuing. That combined with the impracticality of an art degree (a piece of knowledge bestowed upon me by every person who thought they knew what was best for me) pushed me towards Computer Science. So, I went off to college and pretty much-left music and art behind, aside from the occasional cello and piano practice. The idea that I could start writing and performing my own pieces was definitely nowhere on my radar. This was more of a time where my musical tastes became more and more fleshed out. I fell in love with the relaxing beats of Nujabes, the emotional freedom of Kid Cudi, the angsty edginess of Tyler the Creator, the eclectic elegance of Shiina Ringo, the imaginative songwriting of Regina Spektor. All these artists and more have slowly helped determine the type of musician I never knew I wanted to be.
Jumping forward past several years of various life events like graduating college, getting a job, moving to a completely different state, and falling in and out of love, I found my way back to the arts in 2014. At this point, I was still learning songs to play on the piano and singing a TON of karaoke that inadvertently made me a much better singer. However, what actually got me back into making music was this guy on Reddit who made his own song and posted it for people to hear it, saying that he just got into making beats. I remember listening to the song and saying to myself “WOW. If he made something like that, why can’t I?”. So from there, I dedicated most of my spare time to learning the world of music production. It was a whole new magically musical world that allowed me to make music like the pros. At around the same time, I was going through some major mental crises that made me fall back into my poetry to help sort myself out mentally. I’d write poems that would turn into raps over the music I made with the subjects usually dealing with my immense feeling of loneliness that resulted from residing in a state that I moved to for my ex-girlfriend. Like most artists, the music became the psychiatrist that would listen to my concerns and help alleviate the general overthinking that I would tend to do.
Two years ago, I finally found the way into performing my material. I had my first ever performance for this political art show out of Tri-Cities, Washington held by the DrewBoy Creative based out of there. I figured that I should start getting myself out there and practicing, so I responded to their open call for poets and artists to perform at the show. I wrote the basis of my poem “Political Bullshit” within an hour of deciding to perform, afterwards making a couple adjustments to make things flow better. The night of the show my nerves were killing me. While I stumbled a few times because of them, the audience’s response was elating; I began to understand why people bare their souls on a stage, as scary as it seemed. It was worth the nerves to hear that my words resonated with a room full of people. From there, it was open mic after open mic to build up the ability to overcome the nerves and hone my performances while working continually building up my repertoire.
Last year, I moved back to San Diego after a 5-year stint in Tri-Cities, Washington, a town in the opposite corner from Seattle. While I loved the bonds I created there, I felt like it was time to return to my roots and be with family. I had no idea how much of an impact this decision would make on my life. After moving back, it seemed like gears were set in motion to accelerate myself into what I had been working towards on the side. I continued to work on music and going to open mics, but at the same time, I started taking better care of myself. I feel like being surrounded by the people who raised me helped put me into a better mindset for self-improvement. I started working out more, finally got some braces, lost about 30 pounds of “Yay, I have a job and can eat and drink what I want now” weight. I became a lot more confident and cared less about what I shouldn’t have been caring about since the beginning: What others thought. I was finally in an environment that was down to accept the weird things that I wanted to do with my life. It opened me up to meeting some of the most influential people in my musical career.
I became in contact with an old friend from high school eight months ago. His name is Raineir Pesebre, and he was the mastermind behind one of my favorite bands from high school, Yujin13. You see, while I decided to go into Computer Science, Rain kept on with his music, going from band to band, venue to venue, scene to scene, learning the ins and outs of the local San Diego DIY Punk scene. Because of that, I felt like he was the perfect person to get in touch with to learn from. Thanks to that correspondence, I’ve become blessed enough to be a part of Lux et Vitae (LEV), our music label, our art collective, our friends and family. It was through them that I learned about the city that I was born in but never had the chance to explore. It was through them I released my first single Trust Fall (which is out on all major streaming sites, by the way), after several months of the song sitting in perfectionist hell. It was with them that I successfully hosted the first show where I ever performed a full set of my music, along with the other fantastic artists on the label. It was through them that I felt like this music thing can actually be more than a hobby. It was through them that I started feeling a lot more confident with my art, seeing that this group of extremely talented individuals saw me fit to join their ranks.
Now, despite all the growth and the knowledge I’ve accrued over the years, despite the distance I’ve come from the first time I touched an instrument, I know that I’ve barely made it out of the training stages and the real journey has yet to come. I can tell with every time I step on the stage with veterans who have been killing it for years. I can tell with every time I forget my confidence along with a couple of lines of my songs. I can tell when I almost sign up for a “Pay to Play” gig that LEV kept me from wasting my money on. I can tell that it’s going to be a very long and daunting journey, but I’m pretty damn ready to take it on.
Great, so let’s dig a little deeper into the story – has it been an easy path overall and if not, what were the challenges you’ve had to overcome?
It has definitely not been a smooth road. The two biggest things that I’ve struggled with on my journey is my job and my mind.
While I’m lucky to have a job that gives me the flexibility to work on my musical projects, there’s still the appropriate work-life balance that I’m working to attain. I accrued a lot of debt from college and poor money handling, so I often feel like I’ve trapped myself in this job. I’m grateful for the job and the opportunities it has presented me, but as time has gone one, it has become less and less satisfying, a reason that turned me onto music in the first place. So, at this point, there’s this stress of making sure that I can pay my bills, do my work, and work on music at the same time that often compounds off of my own mental struggles.
Those mental struggles often get the best of me as I tend to over-analyze things, which leaves me in bed and prevents me from actually doing the things that I need to actually do. I also deal with a lot of self-esteem issues that bring down my opinion of my own music. I always get caught up in comparing myself to others saying that “Man, why isn’t my stuff as good as this other artists?” or “My stuff is too corny for the rap game.” I jump to worst case scenarios and think speculation into truth.
Both of these things have plagued me for as long as I can remember, but every day I’m working on removing those blocks so that I can focus on what’s important to me.
We’d love to hear more about what you do.
I used to label myself as a rapper, but as time has gone on, I’ve figured that I’m just a musician. I rap, I sing, I play instruments, I make the music that I perform with, and that’s definitely more than just a rapper. My music is rooted in the realm of hip-hop, but it’s as widespread as my influences.
My main goal is to make music that helps people feel less alone in their emotions. A huge thing that I’ve noticed is that with the advent of social media, the world’s minds are being exposed to a new wave of mental health problems. The concept of FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) was a term that arose a couple years ago that I feel like is a major driving force behind this as we’re constantly tuned into the lives of people we otherwise wouldn’t be keeping up with without social media.
The idea that everyone is out there showing off their best lives makes us as the viewer not value the best parts of OUR lives. I’ve been working on being more open on social media about the negatives in my life so that people don’t feel alone in their struggles and at the same time realize that no one’s life is as perfect as their timeline. I want to be for these people like what Linkin Park, Kid Cudi, and Tyler the Creator were for me: Someone who knows pain and isn’t afraid to let others know they aren’t alone in their pain.
One of my biggest achievements as a musician was the first show I ever put on called The Howling. It was a joint venture with LEV where we had most of the artists in the collective play music. The turn out far exceeded my expectations and despite a couple setbacks, we were able to have a fantastic night where I performed my first ever set. For a first timer, I think I did an amazing job. The applause from the crowd really made the whole stressful day worth it.
I think the biggest thing that separates me from other artists is that I’m not afraid to not sound like everyone else. While I used to be afraid, I realize that it’s definitely more worth it to be different and be you. When I make my music, I used to be worried about how a song doesn’t follow a conventional format, or it sounds like something different like it’s a bad thing. But now I’m not afraid to use the experiences that are unique to me to make the art that represents me.
What moment in your career do you look back most fondly on?
One of my proudest moments is after I released my first single Trust Fall and I had all my friends coming around and telling me how catchy the song was and them singing the lyrics back to me. It’s almost surreal whenever people start singing my songs. I almost feel like I’m not worthy of the praise of that level, but at the same time, damn does it feel good.
Contact Info:
- Email: joseph.brightside@gmail.com
- Instagram: @winlove.js
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/JosephWinloveMusic
- Other: https://josephwinlove.bandcamp.com
Image Credit:
Brian Calilung, Richard Alfonso, Joshua Timog, Angelo Cudal, Francis Santiago
Getting in touch: SDVoyager is built on recommendations from the community; it’s how we uncover hidden gems, so if you know someone who deserves recognition please let us know here.
