Today we’d like to introduce you to Shari Botwin
Hi Shari, we’re thrilled to have a chance to learn your story today. So, before we get into specifics, maybe you can briefly walk us through how you got to where you are today?
From a young age, I decided that “someday, someone will hear me.” In order to survive years of childhood sexual abuse within my family, I had this mantra that I said to myself. I remember this first time this statement came into my mind. I was standing on the playground in the fourth grade. I watched all the kids interacting, and I felt like such a misfit. At that time, and for many years to follow, I could not let myself know the facts about what was happening to me. However, I knew that something was very wrong and that I was “different” than all the other kids. As I got older, the feelings of shame and despair grew. In order to stay sane and stay alive, I told myself that I needed to keep fighting. When I was in my mid-twenties, the memories of my abuse came back. The floodgates opened, and I spent over ten years in intensive outpatient therapy. On countless occasions, I felt like I wanted to disappear, and I wanted to quit therapy. In order to continue moving forward, I needed to find my purpose and know that at some point I would find a way to turn my pain into something powerful. For the last twenty years, I have been counseling survivors of all types of childhood trauma. Every time clients disclose traumas from their childhood, I feel like I have purpose. I know I can help them and that there is so much hope from letting ourselves know, understand and speak the truth.
Alright, so let’s dig a little deeper into the story – has it been an easy path overall and if not, what were the challenges you’ve had to overcome?
The road towards healing has been tumultuous and at times has felt impossible to manage. When I was uncovering years of memories associated with my abuse, I went into shame attacks. I wanted to disappear and make it all go away. It took me years of fighting and utilizing my support system to continue moving forward. Each time a new memory surfaced, I felt tremendous guilt. I felt like I was “ruining” other peoples’ lives. It took me hundreds of therapy sessions to realize that speaking the truth was not the problem. The problem was that it happened. During the height of intensive trauma therapy, I was diagnosed with thyroid cancer. I had this belief that the reason I got cancer was because I opened my mouth. Every birthday, holiday and anniversary associated with my childhood trauma is painful. However, I continue to move ahead, and now I am able to face these obstacles with more self-love and self-compassion.
Alright, so let’s switch gears a bit and talk business. What should we know about your work?
I have learned so much about myself and others by sitting with warriors who are confronted with complex post traumatic stress, memories of abuse, abandonment and neglect. I specialize in counseling men and women and teens who have survived domestic violence, sexual assault, depression, anxiety and sudden loss. My niche is working with adult survivors of childhood abuse. What sets me apart from other clinicians is my candidness about surviving incest, and using my pain to instill hope in others. In May, I published my third book, “Stolen Childhoods: Thriving After Abuse.” https://www.amazon.com/Stolen-Childhoods-Thriving-After-Abuse/dp/1538183625/ I had the opportunity to narrate the audiobook, which was so therapeutic and healing.
I am most proud of the work I have done these last couple of years, serving as a trauma expert witness on behalf of plaintiffs in high-profile cases involving child sex abuse, rape, gun violence and domestic violence. I am about to wrap up testimony in a case that involves over eighty-women who were abused as children by their pediatrician.
How do you think about luck?
I think the bad luck that has come my way has ended playing out in my benefit. The injustice and wrong-doings done to me has made me stronger, braver and more determined to help myself and others!
Contact Info:
- Website: https://www.sharibotwin.com
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/warriorbotwin7
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/sharilcsw
- Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@sharibotwinlcsw3425
