Today we’d like to introduce you to Susan Wais
Susan, we appreciate you taking the time to share your story with us today. Where does your story begin?
When your car breaks down you go to a mechanic, when you have psychological problems you go to a therapist, but what do you do when you have regular, everyday issues that you could use help with that don’t really require therapy? In my previous career as a university psychology professor, my students would frequently approach me with these types of issues not knowing where else to turn. I realized there was a big hole in the system. In response I designed and began offering workshops geared to meet this unmet need. This has been my life’s passion and work for the past 35 years.
With a desire to always learn more, about 15 years ago I completed a Masters in Applied Positive Psychology from the University of Pennsylvania. For my capstone project I developed a workshop for parents on well-being and happiness. Since then, with the support of one of the Area Superintendents from the San Diego Unified School District, Mitzi Merino, I continue to give these workshops to teachers and parents in schools throughout San Diego. I offer these workshops pro bono in public schools because I wanted to volunteer but I couldn’t find an opportunity that I liked so I created my own. Through this work, I have now taught in over 20 schools and in many of these schools I have been offering my workshops every year for over a decade.
Would you say it’s been a smooth road, and if not what are some of the biggest challenges you’ve faced along the way?
It has not always been a smooth road. The classes I offer are designed to fulfill a need that I noticed had previously gone unmet and has often not been widely recognized. Until recently when parents struggle, all too often they struggle in silence and rarely do institutions such as schools see this, much less step in to help. In order for me to offer these workshops I need to convince schools to provide a space for me to give my workshops. However, because schools have many competing priorities and are often attending to countless pressing demands, it can be very difficult to get their attention. First who do I approach – the principal, the head of the PTA, the counselor, then where do we get the space – the auditorium, the library, a classroom, it’s not straight forward. This has been a big challenge for me. However, as I said before, I’ve had the constant support of San Diego Area Superintendent Mitzi Merino who has had the foresight to see the need and promote my work in all the schools she oversees. Plus there has been a recent shift in discourse around parenting and parents well-being. Increasingly people and schools in particular are recognizing the need to take care of parents’ well-being. Beginning with the U.S. Surgeon General Dr. Vivek Murthy issuing an advisory on parents mental health and well-being. This has made my work easier.
As you know, we’re big fans of you and your work. For our readers who might not be as familiar what can you tell them about what you do?
I teach well-being workshops to parents and teachers. I teach Resilience Training, Academic Success workshops, Happiness Habits workshops and run two book clubs. I love what I do. I love working with parents and I love what I teach and how it helps others. I am also very proud of the content of my workshops, every one of which I have designed myself.
Many people think I teach parenting but that is not the case. I teach well-being and happiness and that makes me different. Most people want to be happy and experience well-being and teach their children how to be happy but few know what the science says, much less how to go about teaching their children. That’s where I come in. In my Resilience Trainings I teach parents first, how to focus more on the good in life, this skill enables them to be hardier. Then I teach them skills that help them deal with life’s difficulties. In the Academic Success workshop I teach parents how to help their children develop a growth mindset, which makes them better at school and happier in life. The Happiness Habits workshops teaches participants all the skills research has shown increases well-being and happiness, such as practicing gratitude, fostering connection, and having self-compassion, just to mention a few. I have parents tell me that they’ve taken the workshop before and they will take it again and again each time I give it because they always learn something new that helps them and their families. Not only do they learn from me but they also learn from each other. Parents supporting parents equals a lot of learning and a huge increase in well-being.
The two book clubs I run are only for women. They arose as a result of parents wanting to continue to learn more about well-being and happiness. We come together once a week on zoom and periodically at someone’s house for breakfast. We always have a topic to discuss about happiness and well-being, of course on those days we get together in person we rarely talk about the topic of the day. A central lesson of my work is the importance of community and this is exactly what I foster in these book clubs.
What would you say have been one of the most important lessons you’ve learned?
I’ve learned persistence, I’ve always been pretty persistent but loving these workshops, knowing how they benefit participants (“this time I knew what to say to my son, it felt so good”) and knowing how busy principals are has taught me to not give up.
I’ve also learned how much I love working with women and parents. The book clubs I run have given me the opportunity to realize how much I love witnessing women help and support each other. It absolutely touches my heart when someone brings up an issue they are having and the other women jump in to help and support them.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://partnersinthriving.com
