Today we’d like to introduce you to Anne Richardson.
Anne, please share your story with us. How did you get to where you are today?
I am a survivor of sexual molestation.
The perpetrator was my best friend’s father. There were a lot of us little girls. It was like a Hansel and Gretel story. Fun, candy, toys, games… with an evil witch. Or should I say, ogre?
A turning point happened when I entered mid-life. I noticed I would overreact in anger at times. I also struggled with conflict in my relationships. I decided to go to therapy to discover why. This is where I learned how the abuse affected me. I saw anger as bad and stuffed it or avoided it. I also had trust issues: with authority, my own intuition, and with God. I wondered a loving, good God could allow sexual abuse to happen?
Over time, along with therapy and spiritual practices, I have experienced God’s healing transformation I don’t have answers to why bad things happen but I do know God loves me. I believe God grieves with us in our pain. I am able to capture negative thoughts replacing them with true, positive thoughts. I am able to face conflict in a healthy way. Living with peace and joy is more present in my life. I am more confident in myself and what I am called to do which is to share my journey of healing with others who have had trauma.
Since this healing process has been so life changing for me, I want to share my learnings and practices with others. I created a spiritual recovery group called Not Alone so that other women can live in hope and freedom. This is a 12 session small closed group. Women are able to share their stories in a safe environment while learning various practices to bring about deeper healing. Helping women overcome trauma brings me much joy.
We’re always bombarded by how great it is to pursue your passion, etc. – but we’ve spoken with enough people to know that it’s not always easy. Overall, would you say things have been easy for you?
I think the greatest obstacle is a shame. Many women do not want to talk about it. I have journeyed with women in spiritual direction and Not Alone who have kept it a secret. Sexual abuse is on the rise. Statistics say one out of four women have experienced some form of sexual molestation. This can be anything from exposure to rape. Although there is more awareness today, such as me too movement, still many women keep it a secret and suffer in silence. It is common to believe it was their fault. Or like me, they deny that the abuse had any effect on them. Sexual abuse is not about sex. It is about power and control. Someone, often who you knew and trusted, took something precious from you.
I hope to tell women this message: You don’t need to suffer in silence. You don’t have to stay in a victim mentality. Take courage to admit the abuse happened and explore how it has manifested in your life. It was not your fault. Your wounds do not define you. Don’t let shame, fear, self-doubt, worry, anxiety, poor body image or resentment hold you back. The good news is that there is help available from many sources. Take the first step and tell your story.
We’d love to hear more about your business.
I retired as an Audiologist and obtained certification as a Spiritual Director which is more like spiritual companionship for women who want to deepen their relationship with God. I moved from helping people hear their outer world into listening to their internal world.
Spiritual Direction takes place in a confidential, one-on-one meeting together usually for an hour once a month. Women may come to learn more practices and prayers or even discern what God is asking of them. God is in all things and is concerned with all aspects of one’s life. I ask open-ended questions, encouragement, compassion, and deep listening to help one explore and pay attention to what God is up to in their lives. Although my faith is Christian, other faiths are welcome.
I also have a passion to come alongside women who have had trauma and desire spiritual healing. Therapy was insightful and helpful, yet various spiritual practices have allowed deeper healing in my life. Based on my experience over the years, I have created a Christian based spiritual recovery process called Not Alone. Integrating one’s faith and spiritual practices while growing a personal relationship with God has helped many in recovery from the effects of emotional, physical or sexual trauma. The complex consequences often create hidden and ongoing psychological and spiritual wounds impacting one’s life captivated by past hurts and difficulties. Problems may affect personal growth, contentment, and one’s ability to cope with and fully enjoy relationships. Sharing stories in a small group while inviting God into brokenness can support the healing process to grieve and release the pain of the past.
Participants will be able to share in a safe, confidential small group while developing awareness of how such experiences may impact one’s life and wellbeing. Topics will include: Being the beloved, trusting God, fear, worry, anger, shame, addictions, and relationships. Specific spiritual tools: reflection and contemplative practices, biblical understandings and prayers will be presented to encourage self-awareness and openness to God’s healing relationship. As healing occurs, one is able to experience more freedom and the fruits of the Spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, goodness, faithfulness, and self-control. This group is designed to complement, not replace, any previous or ongoing professional counseling.
Although transformation is a lifelong process, I have witnessed women become more free from being a part of Not Alone.
The next Not Alone group will start in January. A workbook will be published soon, called Not Alone.
Do you recommend any apps, books or podcasts that have been helpful to you?
Bromley, Nicole Braddock (2007) Hush: Moving From Silence to Healing After Childhood Sexual Abuse.
Allender, Dan B. with Mullins, Traci (2016) Healing the Wounded Heart Workbook: The Heartache of sexual abuse and the Hope of Transformation.
Calhoun, Adele Ahlberg (2005) Spiritual Disciplines Handbook: Practices that Transform Us.
Cloud, Henry, Ph.D. and Townsend John, Ph.D. (1995) Boundaries Workbook, (1995) Safe People, (2003) Boundaries Face to Face.
Mulholland, Robert (1993) Invitation to a Journey and (2006) The Deeper Journey.
McKay, Matthew, Ph.D., Fanning, Patrick, Church, Carole Honey, and Sutker, Catherine (2005) The Self-Esteem Companion: Simple Exercises to Help You Challenge Your Inner Critic and Celebrate Your Personal Strengths.
Benner, David G. (2004) The Gift of Being Yourself.
Apps: Pray as You Go
Pricing:
- Fee for Not Alone recovery group is the workbook: $25.00. Donation at the end of the group is accepted.
- Fee for Spiritual Direction: Sliding scale: $25.00-50.00 donation to my favorite charities
Contact Info:
- Website: spiritualdirectionandtrauma.
com. - Email: annerichardson58@gmail.com
Image Credit:
Ron Richardson
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