We recently had the chance to connect with DesiRee Preston and have shared our conversation below.
DesiRee, we’re thrilled to have you with us today. Before we jump into your intro and the heart of the interview, let’s start with a bit of an ice breaker: What are you most proud of building — that nobody sees?
To be honest – my mental health. For my entire adult life, and most of my adolescence, I’ve struggled daily with mental illness in varying degrees. It’s taken many years and lots of difficult, intentional work to get to a point where I feel as if I have some sort of control over my own life regardless of, or in spite of my brain chemistry.
That’s not to say that my day-to-day life is sunshine and rainbows mentally, no. I still have rough periods, days, weeks or even months where accomplishing anything beyond getting out of bed and making sure I’m fed and watered is a pipe dream.
But I’ve been able to develop a few mental tools that help get back to a baseline, and get back into achieving my goals. I can pick myself up off the ground and dust myself off without having to suffocate in guilt for needing to rest.
I allow myself to rest, I forgive myself for perceived faults or missed opportunities, and I try to keep my inner voice kind, even when I am disappointed in myself.
Can you briefly introduce yourself and share what makes you or your brand unique?
Hi readers! I’m DesiRée, but my pseudonym online is Enasni Vee. I’m a cosplayer and content creator, and I started this weird fabric and greasepaint filled journey back in 2007. You may have even seen me prancing around the Gaslamp District during Comic Con dressed as the classic jester version of Harley Quinn over the past decade.
Essentially, I create and wear costumes from my favorite media, and make videos about the build process, skits, and the occasional fan film. I’ve also worked with video game studios where I attend promotional or fan events dressed as a character from the games alongside other cosplayers from the community. When I have the time, I also attend fan conventions and host panels and community photoshoots!
Content creation as a cosplayer is an all-encompassing job. I sew, draft patterns, paint, solder, install lighting, build props, design sets, style wigs, edit videos and photos, write scripts, manage 5+ different social media accounts, take my own photos (most of the time)… the list goes on. AND I have a day job!
While the majority of cosplayers tend to cosplay a vast roster of different characters, a major aspect of my brand has been the character Harley Quinn. I have close to 30 different Harley cosplays, both from official appearances and some of my original design. I love to cosplay other characters, too, but Harley has always been a very large part of my creative life. Personally, I love the “play” aspect of Cosplay, and when I’m in costume I’m also in character. Harley Quinn is one of the most thrilling characters to play, largely because she’s such a fun and bubbly force of nature. It’s hard to have a bad day when you’re Harley.
Okay, so here’s a deep one: What part of you has served its purpose and must now be released?
Fear.
Fear of failure, of confrontation, of others, of standing up for myself, of the “what if”, fear of being myself.
I think while I wanted my fear to protect me in my 20s and my teenage years, it just ended up making me a jaded, closed off person. It led to many things I would have enjoyed passing me by, while I sat in place with my walls up convincing myself I was safe and happy.
Here smack dab in the middle of my 30s, I’ve been able to realize that my fear was not helping me at all. I’ve been working to release that fear, to be a more open person, to not take on all of the tasks because I’m afraid of someone else “messing it up.”
Art is collaborative, art is sharing yourself. Cosplay is a community, and every aspect of cosplay is driven BY the community. I spent my 20s wanting to be a part of the larger community without being willing to share myself. Letting my fear rule my actions and inaction was stifling, and made a lot of my work feel disingenuous, to me at the very least.
What fear has held you back the most in your life?
Fear of failure, and the fear of imperfection. I believe they are intertwined, symbiotic.
I have had costumes stuck “in progress” for years, because I needed with my entire being for them to turn out absolutely flawless. These are costumes I desperately want to make, characters I desperately want to cosplay! But my fear of failing, the idea of not knowing if I would look exactly how I wanted to look would stop me dead in my tracks.
I can look back at my work in progress photos from those costumes (still unfinished) and see that I was foolish, that the costumes were turning out beautifully. I just couldn’t see it in the moment. I could only see the future where I crashed and burned, and wasted time and money and effort.
Somewhere along the way, I hit devastatingly bad burnout and it’s taken me until recent years to really begin the recovery process. To remember that cosplay at it’s core is about fun, and if I’m not having fun making these costumes, why am I doing this? Fear is one hell of a drug, and it takes all of your effort to face it and overcome it.
I think our readers would appreciate hearing more about your values and what you think matters in life and career, etc. So our next question is along those lines. Whose ideas do you rely on most that aren’t your own?
I mentioned earlier that Cosplay is a community driven industry, and that is especially true here. The vast majority of ideas and techniques for costume and content creation have been shared and passed down between community members for decades. I learned most of what I know today about making costumes through tutorials and videos created by other cosplayers. I learned the proper way to make a corseted bunny suit from a picture tutorial on DeviantArt, I learned dynamic posing from a panel of cosplayers at a small convention in North Texas, I learned how to clean and repair my sewing machine from a forum of quilters online.
Everything I have learned, I owe to the cosplay and sewing community at large. My skills would not be at the level they are today without other people before me first learning and sharing them as well.
Okay, so let’s keep going with one more question that means a lot to us: What pain do you resist facing directly?
I think the idea that I may never truly “make it” as a content creator. The market is absolutely saturated with creators, everywhere you look someone has their phone or camera out filming content. You can scroll on TikTok for hours and not come across the same creator twice.
I resist facing it because it wounds the ego, the idea that I’m not palatable to everyone. But that’s life! Some people just aren’t going to like you. And the reality is, not everyone will reach the heights of people like Markiplier or Mr Beast, who are making tens of millions with their brand.
But I don’t think I want millions. I just want a fun, friendly community, and enough income to create my art, live comfortably while doing so, and help others when I can. A vacation would be nice, too.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://patreon.com/Enasnivee
- Instagram: @EnasniVee
- Facebook: https://facebook.com/EnasniVee
- Youtube: https://youtube.com/enasnivee
- Other: https://tiktok.com/@Enasni
