Life, Values & Legacy: Our Chat with Amy Chadwick ND of Carlsbad

We’re looking forward to introducing you to Amy Chadwick ND. Check out our conversation below.

Good morning Amy, we’re so happy to have you here with us and we’d love to explore your story and how you think about life and legacy and so much more. So let’s start with a question we often ask: What is something outside of work that is bringing you joy lately?
Climbing! 2 1/2 years ago a friend in my writing group strode in to our session and said, “Chadwick, do you want to climb?” I offered her a full-bodied yes. I knew she had been working with a climbing coach, learning technique on boulders and top-rope climbs. But, to continue top-rope climbing, one needs a partner. I hadn’t been on a climbing wall since my late teens and had done plenty of rock scrambling over my years hiking and being in the wilderness in Idaho and Alaska, but I was definitely coming to this as a beginner. A week later, we were taking a belay lesson, learning to tie the double figure 8 knot, memorize the safety checks and practice the pull, lower, under, slide motion of the belayer necessary to keep their climbing partner safe and held on the wall. Within the hour, I was climbing a 50 foot wall, an easy beginner climb. My body felt every muscle. I was out of shape, and this was hard. But, somehow it also felt like the most natural motion: primal, instinctive. Every week, twice a week, we meet at the climbing gym and tackle hard climbs, always working at the ever changing edge of our skills and strength. And every week, we share stories, talk about life and art, writing and literature, politics and ideas, grief and love, relationships and food. Every week I am invited to challenge myself, to breathe, to practice self-compassion, to settle in to my body. I laugh and cry. We finish the climb with snacks and coffee and more regenerative conversation, and each week, twice a week, my cup is filled.

Can you briefly introduce yourself and share what makes you or your brand unique?
I’m a licensed Naturopathic Doctor and specialize in Endobiogenic Medicine and Integrative Physiology. I have a private practice in Carlsbad, CA, seeing patients of all ages, both in person and virtually. I see and think in patterns and systems and cultivate a deep curiosity about life. There is a pattern to the way our bodies work, adapt and move through the world that is individually unique and intricate. We each have our super powers: our gifts and strategies. And, we have vulnerabilities. When we have unmet needs and/or overwhelming demands, our areas of vulnerability are the most likely to present as out of balance or dis-eased.

We are constantly adapting, meeting the needs of the moment, whether that is simply through adjusting our internal hydration state or blood pressure, or altering immune function, or experiencing an emotional challenge. We are adapting to internal and external needs and demands: mental, emotional, physical, real and imagined. Our perceptions dramatically affect the intensity of response our body has to any particular demand. And, when we have unmet needs or overwhelming demands, our capacity for easeful adaptation is limited. The body is always doing what it is doing for a reason, with the resources and capacity that it has at the time. The Endobiogenic theory recognizes that it is our endocrine (hormonal) system that manages all of this adaptation. This means in some ways that everything is hormonal; and in many ways that some of the things we currently attribute to certain hormones is much more nuanced or even misinformed, and this may reflect the reasons why some interventions work for one person but are not precise to another’s needs.

More recently, I have begun incorporating “parts work,” as delineated by the Internal Family Systems therapy model, recognizing that our subconscious “parts” are responding to our needs through the lens of past wounds and protective strategies. With compassionate curiosity, I invite patients to get to know their parts and together we provide a space for listening, and for healing old wounds. This can impact not only our mental/emotional wellness, but directly impact our physical bodies, our patterns of adaptation and our overall resilience.

Another area I have been exploring, studying, teaching and writing about is the physiology of resilience. One of our internal chemicals of resilience is endorphins. And, I am theorizing that we cultivate a healthy endorphin bank through a present, attentive awareness to beauty, to the many ways life offers messages of safety and belonging and pleasure through our senses. Our sensory system is our interface life through touch, taste, smell, sound and sight as well as our interface with our internal milieu, the functioning of our organs and our sense of place and space.

Without a sufficient endorphin bank, and without an ability to connect to that which cultivates and invites a sense of safety into our cellular being, we are guarded, protected, and often exaggerated in our adaptive responses in ways which can be both internally and externally painful. With a sufficient endorphin bank, we have more access to our core self, our parts each can be heard and experience healing without resorting to protective strategies that may cause harm. And, our physiologic manager, the endocrine system, is more resourced to adapt with ease, to respond to various demands, stressors and needs, in a way that is skillful to the situation.

Along with the nuts and bolts of doctoring: diagnosis and treatment; the work of supporting the individual experiencing the symptoms, the person with the needs, is made richer and more nuanced and so much more fun through this compassionate inquiry in to who we are, what forms us, what informs us, what patterns are impacting us, and what our bodies and emotions tell us about what we need to support well being.

Great, so let’s dive into your journey a bit more. What’s a moment that really shaped how you see the world?
When I was young, someone very dear to me experienced severe depression. We were in a religious community and one of our friends announced that the person experiencing the depression must not have prayed enough. Even as a child, this felt heart-wrenchingly cruel and wrong.

After years of infertility and treatment, I got pregnant naturally. It felt like a miracle. And, at 10 weeks, I miscarried. While I knew that miscarriage is certainly not uncommon, this loss was one of my biggest griefs. Not only was the grief intense, but the feeling that a miracle had been stolen from me, or that I must have done something wrong, made this period of time almost unbearable. The perceptions around the grief made it almost impossible to alchemize the deep sorrow and give it the attention, grace and compassion I most needed in order to heal.

When a friend passed from cancer a few years ago, many in our shared healing community responded with shock, sorrow, and the question – but how? She did everything right. She was so healthy. She did her emotional work. Underlying these questions was the sometimes spoken, sometimes unspoken – what did she not get right? That an illness and death that came in someone young and vibrant simply should not be, and that if it should not be, there must be something on which to project our blame.

Many patients share their stories of chronic illness, ongoing pain, and agonizingly often, they experience a sense of shame. That they must be experiencing this suffering because of something they have gotten wrong. That they are being punished, or deserve their circumstances. Each time, my heart breaks, and I am reminded of the lessons I have learned through my life.

In these situations and many others, I have been invited to look at what we do when we are faced with vulnerability, with suffering. I have witnessed how we turn to our underlying conditioning and say or believe stories that we hope will mitigate our own fear. If we eat well, if we pray, if we do the emotional and trauma healing, if pregnancy happened naturally after all this time… if, if, if… life will feel safer, more in our control. Unfortunately, the stories our mind tells to make sense of what is beyond understanding leaves our sensing and feeling selves abandoned and untended. We also have less access to witness the stillness and presence of Being that holds us even as pain and sorrow arise.

Over and over again, I have been invited to sit with my sorrow, to be with the intense and powerful emotions, and to investigate whether any of the stories I am telling myself or others is untrue, and therefore adding to the suffering of myself and those around me. Truth is a tricky thing. There are fundamental truths, but most of our stories are not true or only partially true. And, I have a personal litmus test. If the story I am telling, when taken to its extreme end, leads to shame or blame, it is not 100% true. This inquiry leads me to stay curious, to let questions be unanswered, no matter how painful and ungrounded the uncertainty may feel. The gift of this practice is to be graced with the alchemy that is present when we simply allow for the totality of life.

Being in argument with reality is a sure way to enhance suffering. And while we all are in this argument occasionally, the more awareness we have of it, the more capacity we cultivate for holding big, bold compassion.

These experiences inform my life and my practice. By acknowledging our vulnerability, and witnessing when we are in argument with reality, we are more able to experience life in all of its bigness, mourn what needs to be mourned, delight in what is joyous, and show up for ourselves and others with greater skill. Hope, trust, love, compassion, curiosity and care bloom more vibrantly in me as I choose over and again to be with all that is, no matter the mess, and listen for what is needed. And, without any guarantees of control or safety, be courageous enough to respond to our needs and those in need.

What did suffering teach you that success never could?
See previous answers: I’m going to let the answers to the previous two questions suffice for this one as well.

I think our readers would appreciate hearing more about your values and what you think matters in life and career, etc. So our next question is along those lines. What’s a belief or project you’re committed to, no matter how long it takes?
I’m going big and bold here – rather than one project related to one aspect of life, these are core beliefs and callings that inspire and motivate me to keep learning, growing, that ignite my spiritual practice; the values that inform my day to day work, writing, teaching, creating, playing, and being in community in every practical manner.

Radical humility.
Cultivating unfettered compassion for myself and others.
Practicing abundant curiosity and ongoing learning.
Delighting in beauty.
Creating safe spaces for being and healing, even in the messiest of moments.
Creative expression.
Cultivating and supporting community where all beings are honored, have dignity, whose needs are met so that each one can uniquely self-express, where communal care is the norm, and everyone knows or is reminded of their own infinite worthiness of love.

None of these are a destination or an accomplishment. They are simply the directions I focus my own internal compass, I summon courage, I study, I learn, I grow, I give energy to dismantling my own conscious and subconscious conditioning that inhibit me from moving in this direction. I take the time to cultivate these principles within myself and my relationships, knowing that I fail often, that I will always have much to learn, that I lean in to grace, I easily say I don’t know, and I learn from and honor those who are wiser and have taken steps I have not. These principles are the foundation of who I am in the world and therefore inform my work and relationships and play.

Okay, so let’s keep going with one more question that means a lot to us: Are you doing what you were born to do—or what you were told to do?
I believe I am doing what I was born to do. While I think living according to my design could have taken many forms, I also know that since I was 9 years old, I wanted to become a doctor. The specific journey and the type of medicine I practice were entirely foreign to me at that time. But, throughout my life, I have received strong intuitive yes’ and no’s; life inviting me to pay attention, take a certain path, try something new, or pivot. I am a manifesting generator in the Human Design model and have witnessed, throughout my life, how I have responded to the invitations that light me up. When I accept, I pursue them whether they make sense for any larger goal or trajectory. I engage them wholeheartedly for as long as they still light me up. And, when I get a “no,” or I suddenly lose all interest or energy, I pay attention and either let that pursuit go, or look at what needs are not being met in my life in order to sustain the energy and desire. This means I have a wealth of experiences. My friends sometimes jokingly and fondly call me the MacGyver, able to pull out my tools and fix or build a piece of furniture, tend to an injured animal or person, nurture the garden, build a fire, offer healing with hands on touch, teach a difficult concept in a way that becomes digestible, cook a four course dinner, lead a yoga class, paint a room, and sit with someone in pain.

With work, pursuing medicine, and the ongoing paths I’ve taken to deepen my education and training, I am constantly inspired. Seeing patients from all backgrounds of life, each with their unique story, physiology and concerns allows me to engage in something new and challenging every day. There are times I need to recharge, tend to my needs, often with solitude or retreat. But when I am with patients, I often feel as if Life is working through me, that I can be a container and vessel for the work, with full delight and eager participation. And, I get to pursue other interests that arise along the way, and witness how each one over time, weaves itself into the fabric of my life and work in ways I never could have imagined. This is a true blessing and I am grateful.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://www.amychadwicknd.com
• Instagram: https://instagram.com/amychadwicknd
• Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/amy-chadwick-nd-facemip-13a8398/
• Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@amycnd

Image Credits
Chaela Pastore – climbing photo

All other photos are taken by me